Template:RandomQuote

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Time to press and squeeze the truth out of her! Figuratively, of course.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Poor girl!? What about poor me!?)

"Phoenix Wright"

- Ms. May. What you said just now was quite... revealing.

"April May"

- Revealing? Ooooh, you'd like that, wouldn't you. Naughty Mr. Lawyer...

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Alright! I've got nothing to lose! Except for... well, everything!)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- Fool! You fell right into my trap!

"April May"

- Hey, guess what. Actually, I, um, really hate your guts. So get lost. Because, well, I'm not cooperating.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Thanks, I noticed.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- (If I can't rip this guy's testimony apart, I'm done for. Why do I always feel like it's the end of the world and I'm the last man standing?)

"Phoenix Wright"

- Both witnesses are telling the truth. (For once...)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- Not so fast, Phoenix Wright!

"Phoenix Wright"

- Eh? (What! No way he can worm his way out of this one! Oh wait... I forgot. It's Edgeworth.)

"Maya Fey"

- Um, maybe I shouldn't be saying this... But he definitely did it. Murder. At least once. Maybe twice.

"Phoenix Wright"

- Ohhh yeah, right here! Sherlock Holmes II, baby!

"Dee Vasquez"

- One ook for each hour. Ook ook ook ook. Always with the ooking.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (She sure is one hell of an Oldbag...)

"Wendy Oldbag"

- Really, you should try not to get so excited at your age. You might strain something.

"Judge"

- ...

"Maya Fey"

- Old windbag sure has balls! Or... well, you know what I mean.

"Maya Fey"

- Well, I'd say this was a turn for the unexpected, but I kind of expected this...

"Phoenix Wright"

- (The windbag... speechless. This has got to be a first.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- (No, this isn't a bad dream, Your Honor. Witness the power of the Oldbag...)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- *grumble* (I'll kill this woman, I swear it...)

"Phoenix Wright"

- (I feel sorry for Edgeworth, almost. She really left him hanging on this one.)

"Maya Fey"

- (Oh great! Stop the presses, the windbag wants to talk.

"Cody Hackins"

- But that's my card! By offering me something I already own, you're in effect eschewing the very basis of our consumer society, namely the principle of fair trade! Man, for a grown-up, you sure are dumb!

"Phoenix Wright"

- (W-what do they teach these kids in school these days!? Quantum physics!?)

"Maya Fey"

- Umm... Nick? Will I grow up to be like her? Please say "no."

"Maya Fey"

- Old windbag sure has balls! Or... well, you know what I mean.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Apparently, E.S.P. is no aid in detecting sarcasm...)

"Phoenix Wright"

- Difficult-looking legal books stand in a formidable row. They mock me. I tried reading one once. It made my head hurt. My hand slipped and I dropped it. Then my foot hurt too.

"Dick Gumshoe"

- Well, pal, then you got a job to do! Help out Mr. Edgeworth! Prove that badge you wear isn't just some fancy piece of metal! Prove it to me, pal! Show me you're an attorney!

"Manfred von Karma"

- I've heard of desperate men grasping at straws... But this is the first time I've heard of men grasping at macaws! Hah!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- Whooooooooooooop!... I... I feel foolish.

"Judge"

- Everyone makes mistakes. Even I once wasted an entire day looking for my dentures. They were in my mouth all along!

"Mike Meekins"

- DOWN ON YOUR HANDS!!! FLOOR ON YOUR HEAD!!!

"Mike Meekins"

- Do unto others before they do unto you!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- What the hell is that wriggling piece of plywood?!

"Dick Gumshoe"

- If you wanna blame anyone, blame society, pal!

"Jake Marshall"

- Most desperados I know don't care for such matters.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Most desperados I know don't join the police force)

"Judge"

- Ah, I remember when I was young and in love. Oh, it was a jolly time.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (What... What's come over me...? Without thinking, I just blurted out, "Objection!" ...And I yelled it at the top of my lungs, finger outstretched, ready to take on my opponent! What a rush!)

"Phoenix Wright"

- Mr. Wellington loves large bananas!

"Phoenix Wright"

- The iron in this door was tempered, making it very solid. But I guess it wasn't strong enough to withstand The Phoenix!

"Phoenix Wright"

- (...What is it!? Is it my hair? Is it too spiky? Not spiky enough!?)

"Phoenix Wright"

- (First, a girl that runs away, and now an old lady who says I stink at doing my job... When did I become the poster boy for "How Not to Make a First Impression"...?)

"Judge"

- Now, now, let's all be one happy family... OK...?

"Franziska von Karma"

- Ignorance is to be whipped.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Alright! With this, the rest of the trial should be in the b--)  (... blast radius of disaster.)

"Franziska von Karma"

- A foolish choice by a foolish fool who wishes to feel the foolish sadness of a sad fool.

"Phoenix Wright"

- Right now, I can't believe any of this! I'm not even sure if this day hasn't been some kind of Kafkaesque dream...

"Maya Fey"

- Maybe you should leave the courtroom drama for video games and rethink that one...

"Judge"

- Are you claiming Regina Berry killed someone with a small bottle of pepper!?

"Judge"

- Order! Order! Bailiff, I don't care who it is, smack anyone who's loud in the face! Twice if you must!

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Uh oh, the judge has that dazed look again. Maybe he should get out more.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- Au contraire mon frére! It does indeed have something to do with the question!

"Phoenix Wright"

- See! This is how Acro was able to kill the ringmaster! With the force of gravity and Maximillion Galactica's ample bust!

"Judge"

- That... The matter of puppet marriage is not under review in this case!

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Alright! Time to take on this monkey, attorney-style!)

"Phoenix Wright"

- (But I'm a good thunker! At least my teachers always said I was...)

"Judge"

- Mr. Quist, I would prefer if you avoided slandering innocent fiats in my court.

"Judge"

- Mr. Wright's argument was so circular, I'm still a bit dizzy!

"Shelly de Killer"

- Oh, yes, that's right. Now that I am playing the role of the kidnapper, I can't pass up this chance to say, "And don't even think about callin' the cops!" ...Hmm, not great, but you get the idea.

"Ray Gun"

- *rata-tat-tat-tat-tat...*

"Phoenix Wright"

- Zoinks! It's the alien!

"Phoenix Wright"

- Stars never need a logical, or sane reason for anything!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- I've thought long and hard this past year about what it means to be a "prosecutor". And from here on out, I will show you the answer I have come to discover!

"Phoenix Wright"

- You're lying, dammit! And I can prove it!

"Phoenix Wright"

- The miracle never happen [sic].

"Mia Fey"

- Well, we know whose milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...

"Winston Payne"

- Love is a mysterious thing, and I object to this line of questioning! If you were to look at my wife for example, you might all be shocked!

"Judge"

- He's telling the truth. It was truly, truly shocking.

"Winston Payne"

- ... By the way, I have never ONCE considered leaving MY wife!

"Judge"

- No one cares, Mr. Payne.

"Dahlia Hawthorne"

- Yes. They're all very fond of their drugs...

"Mia Fey"

- Boy, this poor kid doesn't have a clue...

"Winston Payne"

- I can't accept this! It's like losing to my daughter!

"Godot"

- Blacker than a moonless night, hotter and more bitter than hell itself.. That is coffee.

"Godot"

- Men that are trapped by the chains of "Maybe" ...can never reach their dreams!

"Judge"

- It just seems like the defense was playing with himself.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Could you please rephrase that, Your Honor? For my sake...)

"Godot"

- There’s no point in struggling. You’re caught in a snare. The relentless snare of the law!

"Godot"

- You're saying that if something isn't normal, it simply isn't possible? Where does that leave the porcu-headed lawyer and the topknot chick over there... and the ungodly cool guy with the mask over here?

"Godot"

- Don't let the mysteries of yesterday mystify you today... Only losers think like that.

"Victor Kudo"

- Victor Kudo never makes mistakes! I dot every t and cross every i!

"Phoenix Wright"

- (Congratulations. You have earned the title of Battiest Man To Grace A Courtroom.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- He's gotta be using some sort of infinite ammo code with that box of seeds...

"Diego Armando"

- A lawyer is someone who smiles no matter how bad it gets.

"Diego Armando"

- Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains must be the truth.

"Diego Armando"

- The only time a lawyer can cry is when it's all over.

"Dick Gumshoe"

- The truth is... When I was a kid... I wanted to be a wizard!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (...Gumshoe indeed! Like gum on your shoe, he's impossible to get rid of!)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (Is there some sort of "Kick Me" sign stuck to the defense's bench!?)

"Franziska von Karma"

- You huffy puffy, loosey-goosey excuse for a whimpering whining wuss of a witness!

"Godot"

- Hey, Filly. Know your role, and shut your mouth. I can’t stand women like you.

"Godot"

- I'm only going to say this once, Lady von Whippingberg. Go home!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- Discrepancies such as this will sow seeds in any human heart.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (I don't know what the killer's plan was... but it's a fact that the killer left the writing on the lantern. There must be a reason for it!) There's only one reason! One as obvious as Jean Armstrong in a thong on the Riviera!

"Godot"

- Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains must be the truth.

"Godot"

- In my world, the color red doesn't exist.

"Godot"

- Final judgment will be rendered by me!

"Godot"

- The only time a lawyer can cry is when it's all over.

"Apollo Justice"

- (First trial: nervous. Meeting him: cardiac arrest.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- Let's put the past behind us shall we? For these days, I am merely Phoenix Wright, piano player.

"Winston Payne"

- To think I saw you enter this room a fresh attorney... and now I'll see you leave in chains.

"Kristoph Gavin"

- Only the cards, their backs wreathed in blue flame, know its final outcome.

"Kristoph Gavin"

- I'd only ask that you leave the defending to your defense, in the future. Otherwise... I cannot guarantee the outcome.

"Kristoph Gavin"

- Perhaps a fifth person came and took it out? Oh, and a sixth person could've helped!

"Phoenix Wright"

- What tangled webs we weave when we practice to deceive. So tangled, we catch ourselves in the process.

"Phoenix Wright"

- How does it feel to stand here before Phoenix Wright, the Forgin' Attorney himself?

"Klavier Gavin"

- I must say I'm used to being inspected by the ladies, but this is the first time I've felt this way with a man.

"Trucy Wright"

- All sorts of things come out of my panties. Even the truth.

"Apollo Justice"

- I'm a lawyer. I live for needless procedures.

"Apollo Justice"

- (It's actually a relief to be so thoroughly ignored.)

"Apollo Justice"

- This car belongs to someone at the Meraktis Clinic... and it hit Mr. Wright. Mr. Wright sprained his ankle, and the car lost a side-view mirror. This car vs. Mr. Wright... Not quite the match of the century.

"Klavier Gavin"

- How many panties are you carrying in your pocket, Herr Forehead?

"Judge"

- Too many brides these days can't even weave baskets blindfolded... underwater.

"Apollo Justice"

- (Note to self: Ema lacks a sense of humor. Use caution.)

"Ema Skye"

- Don't even think of going in there unless you want a piece of Snackoos in your face!

"Apollo Justice"

- (Is she ever in a good mood, I wonder?)

"Klavier Gavin"

- Achtung, baby! Today, we play it my way!

"Apollo Justice"

- (What's that... noise?)

"Daryan Crescend"

- Say "hi" for me, OK? Oh, and "screw you".

"Phoenix Wright"

- Their debut single was only 2 minutes and 15 seconds long? What a rip-off!

"Phoenix Wright"

- Did the doctor say anything concerning the cause of death?

"Valant Gramarye"

- Why yes... I believe he screamed, "My God! He's been shot in the head!"

"Drew Misham"

- Perhaps you've heard that you can make any color as long as you have the three primary colors? Well, it's a lie.

"Phoenix Wright"

- This plant has seen me grow from a rookie, to an ace... to a has-been. I hate you, plant... Just kidding.

"Phoenix Wright"

- I must have seen that painting a thousand times, but I never really looked at it until now. I guess my head was too stuck in the trials... I never had time to stop and appreciate art. I have time now. OK. Let's appreciate. ... Actually, it's pretty lame.

"Phoenix Wright"

- (I think an eight-year-old just massaged my ego.)

"Phoenix Wright"

- I just don't know much about anything other than law. (Or even much about law, if you were to ask some people.)

"Valant Gramarye"

- Allakazooooooooooooomg!

"Phoenix Wright"

- To be honest, I was pretty lost those first few days. Thinking back on it, it was a pretty dark time in my life. But Trucy... happy, smiling Trucy... she was my light.

"Apollo Justice"

- ...Valant Gramarye! (...Using the door like an average muggle, no less.)

"Trucy Wright"

- It's like that thing they say! "Baby frogs grow up to be frogs"...? I always thought it was funny, though. Aren't baby frogs called "tadpoles"...? Maybe they thought it would be easier to understand that way for kids. How stupid!

"Apollo Justice"

- (Ack! "Attorney Makes Wild Claim... Becomes Subject of Mass Ridicule"... end quote! Better come up with something quick before that story goes to print...!)

"Klavier Gavin"

- Are you... telling the truth, Apollo Justice...?

"Phoenix Wright"

- Judge wisely. Judge well.

"Phoenix Wright"

- You know what I've been thinking? People don't die that easily, really... As long as they've got something worth living for.

"Vera Misham"

- The door is open. The world is waiting. Thank you.

"Wesley Stickler"

- I have a new name, one that reflects my true academic nature... Wesley Sicko, reporting! Yes, curiosity is a sickness, and I am the cure!

"Maggey Bryde"

- I'm just a lowly security guard, so... ... I'm not sure what I should do with that other than to guard it!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (*sigh* It's like talking to another Gumshoe)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- Only two pieces? I believe the proper phrase here is, "you fail."

"Rhoda Teneiro"

- Do you pinky-swear you do, on your honor as a professional prosecutor?

"Miles Edgeworth"

- I-I pink-swear I do, on my honor as a professional prosecutor.

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (Though I grow with each revolution of the planet around the sun...... I have the distinct impression he continues to madly spin in place.)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (... Forensic science has never seemed more ominous to me than at this very moment.)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (Nooooo! Why HER!? Why HERE!? Why NOW!?)

"Kay Faraday"

- You seem to attract all sorts of interesting people, Mr. Edgeworth. "Miles Edgeworth"

- Kay, please, I'm begging you. By all means, do not provoke her any further...

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (*sigh* I don't suppose I can afford to ignore the old bag.

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (D-Do I really inspire this sort of frothing desire from the female masses?)

"Miles Edgeworth"

- This blood here [on an evidence preservation bag] is from Mr. Faraday, but there are no other clues to be found. Which begs the question... do I need to put this bag inside another bag to preserve it as evidence?

"Judge"

- Silence in the courtroom! Silence, I said! Mr. New Prosecutor Recommended by Manfred von Karma Miles Edgeworth and Ms. Genius Prosecutor Successor to Manfred von Karma Franzisk...ack...!

"Franziska von Karma"

- ...You bit your tongue again, didn't you?

"Judge"

- And don't you know it's rude to shout "Objection!" while someone is giving testimony?

"Tyrell Badd"

- I could've stolen this lollipop from you, that's how naive you are!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- There is a flat-panel, a VCR, and a row of Steel Samurai videos on this table. There might be a clue among these... I had better check the titles of these videos. My my, the things I put myself through for the sake of the investigation.

"Miles Edgeworth"

- H-How could this happen two days in a roooooooooooow!?

"Miles Edgeworth"

- The counterpart to the Babahlese butterfly is the Allebahstian flower.

"Franziska von Karma"

- The butterfly and flower. They're both lovely things... but can we interpret this to mean that Allehbahst provides honey to Babahl?

"Miles Edgeworth"

- ... Wh-What the Pink Princess would like to say can wait for the day after eternity!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (I was moved by the performance of this man!? This completely useless, worthless bum!? I fear I may never recover from this...)

"Franziska von Karma"

- Looks like the lesson for today is that when the Steel Samurai and the Pink Princess... take off their masks, they transform into a pair of annoying troublemakers.

"Miles Edgeworth"

- (Heh, don't make me laugh, Kay. Only the Steel Samurai deserves such honor.)

"Franziska von Karma"

- ...Hmph. This is coming from a man who loves shows featuring costumed actors.

"Shi-Long Lang"

- Lang Zi says:......... Just go already!

"Wendy Oldbag"

- Edgey-poooooooo!

"Miles Edgeworth"

- Nnnghhhoooooooooh!!!!

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