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|Asinine Attorney: Japan|
December 2, 1899
|Defense team leader|
|Defense team assistants||
Susato Mikotoba* (co-counsel)
Auchi's topknot* (assault)
|Satoru Hosonaga |
|Sodenoshita Tadashi |
|Supreme Court Defendant Lobby No. 3|
Asinine Attorney: Japan is the the first short story scenario in Dai Gyakuten Saiban 2: Naruhodō Ryūnosuke no Kakugo. It "happens" shortly after The Adventure of the Great Departure. Taketsuchi Auchi tries to press charges against Kazuma Asōgi for cutting his hair.
Before the TrialEdit
- 8:47 AM
Kazuma Asōgi just arrives in the defendant lobby on a steamship then boarded an overnight train. His best friend, Ryūnosuke Naruhodō, has been cleared of charges ten days ago by himself with Asōgi's help, he thinks Naruhodō has real talent. Susato Mikotoba sent the telegram that told him about another complaint and there will be a trial on the fifth, she wrote what Naruhodō said, the more wrote the more expensive the telegram. Asōgi hasn't broken the seal on the envelope he got in his house yet, he just got here. The prosecutor from the last trial raised an objection three days afterward along with additional charges. Asōgi suggests these charges are the prosecutor's revenge, Naruhodō understands how he was defeated by a student while many important people were watching. Asōgi says using the law like that them no better than actual criminals, the public doesn't really trust people in the law, the newspapers have a defense attorney arrested for bribery on the front page. Asōgi will be the defense attorney for today, not Naruhodō. Before Susato can confirm something with Asōgi, the bailiff calls for them, Susato will be his assistant and he'll meet Naruhodō later.
- 9:00 AM
The judge declares court to be in session. The prosecutor, Taketsuchi Auchi, says female Susato shouldn't be in court. But she says he was the one who made a complaint, since this is a special case the judge makes an exception. Kazuma Asōgi is ready end with the original verdict where the real criminal confessed, but Auchi says that's not what the complaint says. Asōgi is actually charged with assault, the only one not surprised is Auchi, he is suing Asōgi for cutting off his topknot and considering it reckless assault since he used a katana in a courtroom! The judge does seem to agree that it was unnecessary and Asōgi realizes he may have gone overboard so he apologizes. Despite his bow, Auchi still wants him to go to prison for six months because his hair won't grow back. Although Mikotoba agrees but Asōgi could not believe this, he doesn't want to accept the charges as his study abroad would then be canceled. Mikotoba objects that Asōgi's katana couldn't reach the prosecutor's bench. Auchi had testimony and evidence, so the judge allows witnesses to take the stand.
Satoru Hosonaga takes the stand with Ryūnosuke Naruhodō introducing himself as a barber, Naruhodō tried to tell him about this but Auchi's kept shushing him. He doesn't think Asōgi cut Auchi's hair, Hosonaga adds that Auchi goes to the tonsure shop he works at but his hair has completely stopped growing ever since it was cut, so not being able to wear a topknot was a fatal blow to Auchi despite it only being ten days. During the cross-examination, Naruhodō suggests that mentions that Asōgi gets a swollen head and starts bragging about weird things after eating beef stew. Asōgi gets mad when Naruhodō says his clan's secret art of sword drawing allows him to slice melon in half from seven meters, but it's hard to find fruit in December and Asōgi just announced that it would be possible to commit the crime. Auchi decides to present a twist rope made of paper from Japan, it's what his topknot was tied with, and it's sliced from a very sharp blade but it proves that it didn't touch his hair. To prove this, the judge has the bailiff get some Japanese paper, Taketsuchi Auchi's hair is a topknot again.
It seems like Kazuma Asōgi can go to the Great British Empire now, but Auchi objects to this. Many Japanese people have signed up for the study abroad, it would basically make them ambassadors, but Asōgi apparently used so dishonest means to get this far. Satoru Hosonaga confirms due to an investigation of his. The selection process for the exchange student was split into several stages and was conducted mainly by the Ministry of Justice, there were three exams: one written, one practical, and one negotiation skills. All the candidates received a score at the end, Hosonaga managed to receive some secret documents saying that Asōgi was in the runner-up position. The judge wants Asōgi to prove his skill by cross-examining Hosonaga. Naruhodō refuses to believe that Asōgi would commit fraud unless it he was that passionate, an anonymous letter was sent to the prosecutor's office accusing the Ministry of Justice's selection panel. Hosonaga slightly drugged high ranked people at the tonsure shop, he took a photo of the documents and gave them to prosecutor Auchi but has an extra copy after being reminded by Naruhodō's suggestion, the judge demands it as evidence despite Auchi's protests.
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